Hungry, Hungry Hippocrates (Hypocrites)
Five Reasons You are A Hypocrite when it comes to Feeding Your Kid
By Rod Budget
(Warning: this article will leave you hanging. For the full Hungry Dad’s discussion, you can check out Episode 18 of the Hungry Dads podcast)
For parents of young children, even the best of us have to stretch the truth, apply double standards, and deny our own base instincts in order to set a good example. Our poor young children, seeing their parents as infallible, cannot not fathom the deceit, struggle and internal turmoil dads face – especially when it comes to food. Lets face it, if you want to raise your kid to eat somewhat healthy and exhibit a little social grace, you’d better get comfortable being a hypocrite. Here are some of the Hungry Dads’ favorite ways we that dads are hypocrites when it comes to food.
#1 You tell your kids that vegetables are “yummy,” when you know they taste awful. If you are like 90% of people, you agree that vegetables are only slightly more enjoyable than that taste you get when you drink orange juice after brushing your teeth. But you don‘t dare admit that to your kids. Heck, you probably even shove some veggies in your mouth and pretend to like it. Liar, liar pants on fire.
#2 You don’t like to share your food with them, despite constantly preaching the value of sharing. When you are trying to eat anything that the kids are not eating (or sometimes when everyone one is eating the exact same thing), those ankle biters will inevitably ask for “a taste,” then “another,” then “more.” To share or not to share? If you decide not to share, prepare for irrational crying or an extended debate. Don’t be surprised when they throw that lecture about sharing back in your face and you end up hungry.
#3 You wait patiently at a restaurant only because of social norms and expectations. Your inner Dad-animal wants to join in with your kid – thrash, beg, cry, and whine until your waiter comes with food. Restaurant anticipation is torture and only etiquette keeps a hungry dad from acting like a hungry baby.
#4 You hide in the closet/car/garage to enjoy a cookie so your kids cannot see your bad habit. As the King of the Castle, you would like to have unfettered access to soda, potato chips, ice cream, cookies and other foods. These things used to be staples in your cupboard. But now that you are a Dad, they are either banned, or at best, “sometimes foods.” As a survival technique, you have perfected what the Hungry Dads call “covert eating,” and consequently you have also upped your personal hypocrisy factor.
#5 You want to play with your food too. Blowing bubbles in milk is fun. Building the highest possible tower of peas can be an intense challenge. But don’t do it. Don’t. Stop. I said stop! You’re making a mess! There are starving children who would like to eat that food!
Check out Episode 18 of Hungry Dads’ Podcast for the discussion, the answers and more.
Rod Budget is a dad. A hungry dad. He can be heard on the podcast Hungry Dads, available in iTunes and at www.hungrydads.com