Dew Kickstart

Mountain Dew Kickstart Energizing Black Cherry

It’s got electrolytes! (says so right on the can)

We all love classic Mountain Dew (despite its alleged gonad shrinking properties), but can a litany of variants with extreme, hardcore names like “Voltage,” and “Kickstarter” carry the Dew mantle? Well, I like their Super Bowl advertising – puppymonkeybaby has come and gone.

imageBottom line, Mountain Dew Kickstart Energizing Black Cherry is secretly half diet soda, and you can taste it. First drink I got that twinge of artificial sweetener that I personally hate. Checked the label – yep Sucralose. I hate Sucralose. If you hate diet, you should stay away. But it’s not marketed as low calorie – and it sort of isn’t low calorie. It has high fructose corn syrup in it and comes int at 80 calories a can – all the while with a diet soda taste. So who is drinking this? I guess some folks prefer the diet flavor regardless of calorie count?

Beyond that, there is nothing impressive about the supposed black cherry flavor. The label claims of being “energizing’, “with just the right amount of kick” proved inaccurate to me. My experience was “bloating,” “with just the right amount of lay down and belch for ten minutes.”

imageAnd those electrolytes? The can literally says they are “for taste.” Wait? What? Really? Is that a thing?! Well, they have to do something to justify electrolytes since they got such a bad rap from Mike Judge in his cult classic, Idiocracy.