Pizza Hut Hot Dog Bites Pizza – The Reasonable, Rational Review
I’ve read reviews of the Pizza Hut Hot Dog Bites Pizza and found one of two things: (1) reviewers who identify with the “extreme junk food” shtick and give an unnaturally enthusiastic thumbs up, or (2) reviewers who are clearly not a fan of Pizza Hut to start and are anxious to sanctimoniously condemn its newest concoction as an abomination and the fall of western civilization.
It’s time for a reasonable, rational review of the Pizza Hut Hot Dog Bites Pizza that only the Hungry Dads can provide. And y’know what? It’s pretty simple. Ready? Here it is: If you like Pizza Hut and/or an average hot dog, there’s no reason to dislike this thing. There’s also no reason to consider it the ultimate in culinary combinations. The pizza tasted like Pizza Hut, for better or for worse (more on that later). The hot dogs were substandard and too salty. Together, the tastes did nothing special, but were not gross as some press is making you believe. Ever been at a cocktail hour and had a pig-in-a-blanket and a mozzarella stick with marinara on the same plate? There you go.
By the end of my meal I was bypassing the hot dogs in favor of the pizza. Fortunately my two-year-old son devoured the hot dog pieces. We had a good team up going. But the hot dogs did something to the crust itself that made it unique and tasty. The stuffed shape and form provided more surface area of crust, and that crust was crispy and fried up nice; I think due to the hot dog encased within it. So the crust (or the “blanket” to the hot dogs’ “pig,” if you will) was a winner for my palate.
Now before you judge me from your high horse as a pizza heretic or somebody with an obviously unsophisticated palate, I feel the need to share my credentials. I live in New York. I eat NYC pizza all of the time. I love it. I revel in it. I can tell you the best places to get real, genuine fresh, amazing pizza. I know good pizza. At no point above did I assert that this Hot Dog Bites Pizza was “good pizza.” I’m simply saying it was tasty – whatever it was. If you want to say “that’s not pizza,” I won’t even argue with you (but I might try to convince you its a silly thing to argue about).
I wouldn’t be naïve enough to compare Pizza Hut to DiFara (or even Famous Rays!) any sooner than you would compare McDonalds’ burgers to Ear Inn’s or Taco Bell to Rosa Mexicano. (replace your favorite legit food faves/legends, NYC or otherwise, as you see fit). So don’t get all judgy on me. Yes, these chain restaurants are serving up prepackaged, nutritionally-stripped, substandard versions of grub that do not warrant much of a comparison to the foods they purport to replicate. But these chains have something to offer. Maybe some nostalgia. Maybe a bargain. Maybe just a fun, no hassle, afternoon with your kids in convenient location with a sprawling booth and some crazy, experimental food combinations.
Epilogue: We all ate a little extra broccoli for dinner, as to balance the universe.